Thursday, June 30, 2011

Introducing... RANBIR KAPOOR!

I had this idea while doing my Bollywood for Beginners series - wouldn't it be fun to see how all our favorite heroes were introduced?

Check out the previous two installments:
Hrithik Roshan and Ajay Devgn!


The build up to Ranbir Kapoor's launch was really insane. Sanjay Leela Bhansali forbade both him and co-debutant Sonam Kapoor from showing their faces in public until the film was launched in order to build suspense. Meanwhile, competing film
Om Shanti Om was playing up nostalgia for Ranbir's father Rishi Kapoor. Kapoors of all types were everywhere!

Saawariya flopped miserably (and will be the subject of my next BOX OFFICE POISON installment) Ranbir's launch was a success and this became an iconic role for him.

We open in blue-ville, the bluest city on the planet!

Our narrator, Gulabji, opens the film by telling us of a wonderful, angelic, simply not to be believed, life-changing man that she once knew... a ROCK STAR ANGEL. (No, really, she says it.)

They met for the first time in a bar...

...the lady orders whiskey. (Johnny Walker Black Label, I'm sure.)

But what is this?! Some doofus ordering a
doodh?! Is Pat Boone here?

Silly Pat Boone!

"Who is this asking for milk in a bar?!"

"I'm the new lead singer here. I'm practicing for my show tomorrow."

[FG: Is that show the BLUE MAN GROUP?!]

"But this is no place for lullabies, faceless man. To get through Sanjay Leela Bhansali's nightmare vision requires something a bit stiffer... like Johnny Walker Black and a Helen number."

"Songs should stir the soul, not the body," replies the faceless man, clearly unaware that this film will only stir a nation's joke-making abilities.

Alas, the faceless man is a philosopher and insists on demonstrating how
deep he is by showing that the soul is real via bar tricks.

It's enough to charm a smile out of the world weary Gulabji...

... although she is skeptical of his singing abilities.

Oh the hubris! Sanjay Leela Bhansali introduces...

Sanjay Leela Bhansali is such a tease!

The blue spotlights are
kiling me!



There we go! Our first glimpse of Mr. Ranbir Kapoor!


Bombay Talkies said...

As much as I hate this film....sigh. Ranbir is nine kinds of adorable. I love that sweet face!

maxqnz said...

Surely it would have been Johnny Walker BLUE label, hai na?

Filmi Girl said...

@Maxqnz HA HA HA!!! I just snorted out loud at that. Surely, you are correct!

maxqnz said...

THanks to you both for confirming what I already suspected: That I'd rather perform D.I.Y. root canal work with a blunt rusty teaspoon than sit though this film. Two traumatically awful SLB films will suffice for this lifetime, and that's why I look forward to your "poison" piece on this film.

triShie said...

don't throw stones at me, but i LOVED Saawariya in all its entireness :) maybe i'm just biased. maybe it's just Ranbir Kapoor <3

The Mighty Mango said...

Wow. I didn't know that SLB kept Sonam and Ranbir on a lease before this was released. O.o Wow, SLB, you really do have a serious flair for the dramatic.

Hence, of course, Ranbir's wonderfully dramatic opening. ;) I honestly didn't hate this film (the cast made that difficult), but it was pretty flawed.

Oh, and as for the blue thing, I've noticed SLB has a thing for colors. While not quite as dramatically as Saawariya's blue, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam was definitely red and Devdas was definitely gold. I haven't seen Guzaarish, but everything about it looks like a kind of purple/navy color, too.

The Mighty Mango said...

Hah, typo before. That would be LEASH, not lease. I'd hope Ranbir and Sonam weren't for lease. Haha.

Sal said...

I actually have a good deal of respect for this film. It's loud, corny, over the top, very into its own prettiness, and utterly committed to its strange, detailed, fairy-tale vision.

eliza bennet said...

This film was the wrong introduction to Ranbir as far as I'm concerned since I was not impressed. But then I saw Rocket Singh and suddenly my eyes were opened to what everyone was talking about. I actually enjoyed Bachna Ae Haseeno because of Ranbir being all kinds of adorable.

In Sawariya though he didn't interest me at all (yeah not even the towel scene), oddly I liked Sonam in Sawariya but later on she killed all that good will with Dilli 6.

I loved and laughed your write up Filmi Girl. It was hillarious. But I too have respect for Saawariya even though I don't like it that much. The director has a vision and he managed to put it on screen. Also I LOVE Rani and she looks so good in it.

Carol said...

It was my first Ranbir film. I hated him SO much in it that it tooks the entire rest of his filmography to make me like him as much as I do now.

Rani, I love you.

Note from Filmi Girl:

I love Bollywood - and all the ridiculous things that happen in Bollywood - but it doesn't mean that I can't occasionally make fun of various celebrities and films.

If you don't like my sense of humor, please just move on by - Trolls are not appreciated and nasty comments will be deleted.

xoxo Filmi Girl
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