Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Top 10 Sexiest Ladies of 2009!

I've already answered People magazine with my list of the Top 10 Sexiest Bollywood Guys of 2009, so now it's time to answer Eastern Eye's list of the Sexiest South Asian Women of 2009.

Eastern Eye list reflects the homogeneous beauty standards that have been sweeping across the globe. To be considered "sexy" in the way that Eastern Eye means it, a woman needs to epitomize the virgin/whore dichotomy. Matlab - the ladies need to look like a playboy model on the outside while also giving the impression that they don't actually take pleasure in their sex appeal. "Sexy" like that is for display purposes only - what could you really do with Lara Dutta or Deepika Padukone (both on Eastern Eye's list) if you had the chance? They look as if they were born right on the pages of a magazine - look but don't touch. To me, that doesn't say sexy - it says imaginary; and it almost makes me wonder if it was a bunch of gay men who made up the list. Eastern Eye's women were chosen for looks but I know that real sexy is more than that!

With that in mind, here are my top 10 Sexiest Women of Bollywood (and a few from beyond) of 2009!

#10 Kalki Koechlin - Smarty Librarian

(The tie just slays me... oh, Kalki...)

Kalki fascinates on so many levels. Not only is she an outsider who has carved a niche for herself in Bollywood, Kalki is so cool that she doesn't even
care that she's carved a niche for herself in Bollywood. If brainy conversation turns you on like it does me, Kalki is your girl. She's sweet, intelligent, and writes plays about Innuit skeletons. What's not to love? All I ask is a nice dinner... some mood lighting... witty repartee... a nice French wine... and I'm all hers.

#9 Bipasha Basu - Caged Tiger

(That snowflake tattoo KILLED me in Aa Dekhen Zara! Don't you just want to lick it?)

Of all the ladies on the
Eastern Eye list, Bips is the one that I want to set free. She just seems so bound up in the beauty conventions of today's Bollywood but whenever you read one of her free-wheeling interviews, I just get the sense of a tiger caged. Her famous abs are nice but she'd look even hotter with a squishy stomach and more free time to take roles like the dream girl in Pankh. Still, she keeps those delicious curves no matter how buff she gets - a girl you can pounce on without fear that she'll break. Bips will take all you can give her and dish it back just as hard.

# 8 Dimple Kapadia - MILF

Another of the
Eastern Eye list's many sins is the omission of anyone over the age of 30ish. To be fair, not everybody saw Dimple steam up the screen in Luck By Chance which just means that those of us who did have even more responsibilities to trumpet the sexiness of Dimple! Forget Farhan and Isha, when Dimple came onscreen, everybody else faded into the background. The wishy-washy daughter played by Isha didn't stand a chance against the sheer force of charisma and steely-nerved will put forth by Dimple. Be honest with yourself - given the chance to mack on an 18-year old starlet who blushes at everything you say or the divine Dimple Kapadia, who could make YOU blush - would you really pick the ingenue? I know I wouldn't.

#7 Hard Kaur - She's a Rock Star kuch bhi kaho...!

I've had the pleasure to meet Hard Kaur in person and let me tell you that she is sexy. Hard Kaur is tough, smart, saucy, and more interested in being true to herself than being popular. She's the kind of woman who dance on national TV in a clown outfit and also be invited to work with the Pussycat Dolls. Her songs are guaranteed to be the highlight of any soundtrack album; that talent and confidence is irresistible. She is one sexy lady.

#6 Mindy Kaling - The Comedienne

Have you seen Subtle Sexuality? Mindy Kaling is not only hilarious, she is gorgeous! Her sharp wit is matched by a set of dangerous curves. And they say laughter is an aphrodisiac... I know she's not Bollywood but how could I not put Mindy on this list. My dream is that one day Mindy and Farah Khan will create a film together because that is the only way that anybody can top the synthesis of the fabulousness of Lady Gaga and Beyonce that is Mindy Kaling as KELLY KAPOOR! (And I would totally hit that, so Ryan the Temp had better watch out.)

#5 Chitrashi Rawat - Keeping it Butch

Apart from (apparently) Saira Banu cross-dressing in (I'm just estimating) every film she ever did and Jesse Randhawa in No Smoking, butch ladies don't get a lot of screen time in Bollywood. All the more reason to encourage the sassy Chitrashi Rawat, whose tomboy act had me melting in my seat during Luck. She's 5'0" of pure awesome. The swager! The over-confidence! The SWAGER! Chitrashi had better be playing butch in some movies in 2010 or Bollywood has me to answer to.

#4 Riya Sen - The Hot Mess

Of all the Sen ladies in Bollywood, Riya Sen is undoubtedly my favorite. She's not a great actress but the woman has oomph overspilling her tan spandex body suit. Show up on set drunk? Sure! Be hungover and call it "food poisoning"? Why not? We've all been there (or maybe just I've been there) but her very human over-indulgences make her that much more relatable. Plus... did I mention the oomph factor? Riya has the kind of curves that make you want to grab her and hold on.

#3 Namitha - The Southern Belle

(Just look at that face!! SEXY!)

Eastern Eye's most unforgivable omission was the one and only Namitha. The woman is sexy personified. Her figure and her public persona tell of a woman who is not afraid of indulging her passions. Namitha won my heart this year in Billa and since then I have been eagerly following her in the news, waiting for stills from her films and lapping up tidbits like the time when she refused to wear a traditional outfit in a film because her fans expect a skin show. Yes. Yes, we do. And Namitha always delivers.

#2 Kangana Ranaut - Fierce Lady

Although Kangs has gotten some flack in the press recently for having her lips plumped, I don't really care. I still think she's gorgeous. And she's so intense! Not only does she play "crazy" better than anybody else - except maybe Rajpal Yadav - Kangs lives the kind of honest life that most other celebs can only dream about. She's no filmi daughter; she's earned everything that has come to her through ambition and hard work. And I love that Kangs is so personally offended by stupid press reports that she had to start her own website just so she could blog directly to her fans (not that she's ever answered one of MY comments but whatevs) and post pictures of herself traveling alone in Italy. So, while I do love her long legs - shown off nicely in Raaz 2 this year - it's her fierceness that I find really sexy.

#1 Katrina Kaif - Diva No. 1

My girl Kat isn't too popular around the blogosphere and I can kind of understand why. It's probably the same reason that Eastern Eye also chose her as number one. She's hot in a very Maxim magazine way. And while I do appreciate that (and all the photo shoots that it brings me), that's not the reason I find her so attractive. When Katrina is onscreen, it's like the rest of the frame seems dull in comparison. When she smiles, she lights up from the inside. She's not toned and plucked and starved within an inch of her life and watching her with Akshay and Ranbir and John, you can see the casual physicality she exudes. She touches them and they manhandle her in a very appealing way. I love seeing Akshay sling her over his shoulder in De Dana Dan or Kat carrying him in Welcome. Katrina may be Barbie's representative in India but she is far from plastic. And I find that very sexy, indeed.


Rum said...

Love your choices! Kalki strikes as one of the most original heroines out there, and she's just so foxy in Dev D. Likewise with Katrina, she's getting better and better with each film she does and i hope she's good in Rajneeti! Lol love Mindy Kalings videos, sooooo funny!

Tady Rox! said...

Mindy ?!?! Freaking is wierd that i was turned on when I saw Subtle sexuality XD ....I really loved ur pix ... I'm glad u had Bips...She's always my Number 1 !!!!!!!!!!!!

Ameya said...

Uh oh, my husband saw that pick of Namitha as i was reading this and he requiress we watch some of her movies- haha. Thats his favorite shape. I need suggestions, O filmi girl!

Filmi Girl said...

@Ameya You need to see Billa!! It's the Telugu remake of Don - only I think it's better. :D

Himmat said...

I agree with your opinion about Kangana's 'fierceness'. I am too much of a 50s - 60s era fan and wouldn't have been able to sit through films like Gangster, Wo Lamhe and Raaz2 if some other actress had done the roles. She's able to transform mediocre dialogue and direction into powerful performances. And that's not easy :-). Plus when emoting dukh-bhari scenes she has that utterly heart melting vulnerable expression which reminds me of young Sadhna and Waheeda. Some girl, this Kangana! I just hope our tunnel-visioned film makers don't try to turn her into a crazy woman stereotype. But she seems like a very authentic, independent minded person as evidenced in the Dus Ka Dum episodes I saw on youtube. She should be able to force things her way eventually.

SpyGirl said...

Oy, Bipasha!

I really need to watch more of her films.

SpyGirl said...

I was so distracted by Bipasha I forgot to say I agree with you about Katrina--she's sunny and sweet and underrated.

Note from Filmi Girl:

I love Bollywood - and all the ridiculous things that happen in Bollywood - but it doesn't mean that I can't occasionally make fun of various celebrities and films.

If you don't like my sense of humor, please just move on by - Trolls are not appreciated and nasty comments will be deleted.

xoxo Filmi Girl
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